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A Birthday Story
Season 2, Episode 7
822x-birthday
Air date November 3, 2010
Directed by Ken Whittingham
Written by Vijal Patel
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A Birthday Story is the seventh episode of season two.


Summary

On his ninth birthday, Brick demands Frankie and Mike tell him the true story about the day he was born, something that has been a Heck family secret. Axl is confused by his new manager at the movie theater who's both hot and dumb.

Pilot

It’s Brick’s birthday! He’s invited every kid in his class to his party. Frankie wishes he would have given her a little more notice. But she caves to his demands the moment Brick reveals his true birthday wish. He wants is to hear the story of the day he was born. This sends panicked shockwaves throughout the Heck house.

Brick knows something is amiss. No one has ever told him the full story behind the day he was born. It was either raining or snowing or really hot depending on which family member you ask. It’s almost like no one wants to say what really happened. Brick suspects he may have been adopted. That would actually explain a lot. But that’s not it. Mike says, “Come on, what adoption agency would give us a baby?” Good point.

Brick’s birthday bash involves a fun trip to the public library. They can’t make too much noise during the festivities because, well, it’s a library. When the other kids splinter off into the book stacks, Frankie realizes it’s time to tell her baby boy the story of the day he was born. The big secret is that Mike missed the actual birth because he was circling the block looking for a parking meter. Brick’s cool with that story. He likes the part where Mike was looking for cheap parking. We all do, Brick. We all do.

Axl has a beautiful new manager at the movie theater. Her name is Kasey. She’s beyond gorgeous and is totally cool if Axl shows up a little late. Kasey knows this isn’t a career job for either of them. She’s just doing it until she can get into beauty school. Axl can’t believe his luck. He says, “I got a hot boss. There’s like whole websites dedicated to the concept.” For proof of this, go to www… oh never mind.

There’s nothing like having a hot boss to inspire a teenage boy to show up for work. Kasey sure looks sexy behind that candy counter. She also looks confused as to how to open the cash register. Axl says the spare key to unlock it is in the office. Kasey was afraid to go in there because of the “personnel only” sign on the door. She thought that meant it was someone’s “personal” office.

Yes, Kasey isn’t the brightest bulb in the movie marquee. She’s completely blown away by the hypnotic appeal of hot dogs cooking on rollers. Axl spends most of his time cleaning up Kasey’s goofs. She offers to go out with him if he bails her out one more time. Believe it or not, Axl says no way. Mike says he’s growing up. He’s beginning to realize that he needs more out of woman than just good looks. Too bad. Kasey really is super-hot.

Remember that story Frankie told Brick about the day he was born? Lies! Brick demands to know the real story which involves a private suite at the hospital that was reserved for Mrs. Ferguson. Who is Mrs. Ferguson? Frankie Heck is Mrs. Ferguson. At least, she claims to be so that she can experience the horrors of childbirth in luxury. Mike reluctantly goes along with the ruse and 27 hours later baby boy Brick was born.

But wait! There’s more! Mike, while playing the part of Mr. Ferguson, tags along when the nurse takes Brick down to the nursery for an infant test. All is well when the nurse leaves. Mike can wheel the baby back to the suite whenever he wants. Unfortunately, he’s distracted by a football game as the real baby boy Ferguson is wheeled in next to Brick. Mike takes the wrong baby back to the room. Frankie and Mike end up taking young Blake Ferguson home with them.

It took a little time before they realized their mistake. Okay, it took a month. Brick thanks his family for their delayed honesty before retiring to Blake’s former room. He’s very upset. Frankie tries to apologize by bringing him a tray of his favorites: waffles and books. It doesn’t fly.

Eventually, Brick forgives his folks for their month-long mistake. The truth is he does have a really cool story birthday story. He presents his parents with a revised list of birthday gifts he’d like. It’s quite substantial. Brick tells Frankie and Mike they don’t have to get every present all at once. They can take their time. They can do it over the course of say…a month.

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